


Drunken Marriages

by justsimplymeagain



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, M/M, Rating May Change, Some Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:35:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24335218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justsimplymeagain/pseuds/justsimplymeagain
Summary: Jim gets drunk - Drunk Jim marries Gotham villains.
Relationships: Jim Gordon/Victor Zsasz, Oswald Cobblepot/Jim Gordon
Comments: 11
Kudos: 53





	1. Gobblepot

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't help myself! I'm sorry...

Jim Gordon had days when he was a heavy drinker, to most who knew him knows that this was nothing new. He wasn’t an alcoholic by any means, not like his best friend Harvey. But he had his moments. So, waking up with a hangover wasn’t something new. What was new; however, was waking up in a place that wasn’t his own and with aches and pains that didn’t speak of getting into a fight. Quite the opposite in fact.

Cursing inwardly, Jim shifted slightly. He was aching in all the right spots that only proved further that last night was filled with sex. Something he honestly tried to avoid while drunk. Because no one could properly consent while drunk, and Jim he wasn’t the kind of guy who took advantage of being drunk or with someone else who was drunk when it comes to sex. It was morally wrong and despite his own shifts in morals from time to time. That was something he would never budge on.

And yet, here he was. Sore, hung over and obviously in someone else’s bed.

It took a lot for Jim to manage to weasel out of someone’s grip enough to see who he slept with only to freeze.

Oswald.

Oh…

Oh shit…

Jim shifted slightly again, trying to get to the edge of the bed when he noticed something else. A ring… a wedding ring.

Oh fuck…

He didn’t…

Looking at Oswald, who was either trying to pretend to sleep or was actually still passed out and saw a matching ring.

He did.

They did…

Harvey will never let this down…

Somehow, Jim managed to get his pants on before Oswald either showed that he was awake or actually woke up. He really didn’t know where his underwear was and didn’t want to waste time looking for them.

“Uh…” Jim managed and watched as Oswald was coming to the same conclusions as Jim going so far as startling at the sight of the ring on his finger. Jim took this moment to steal a look he’d never thought he would see. A disgruntled, tired mobster with a bad case of bedhead looking oddly docile. It was not something he was used to seeing for sure, and even more he wasn’t used to seeing more than a strand out of place. Although, Jim does vaguely remember grabbing a fist full of hair only to receive a bite for his efforts.

“Good morning?” Jim didn’t know what to say and jumped when a woman stormed in with a tray of food and giving Oswald a very disgruntled look. Setting it down and picking up Oswald’s clothing which was all over the room. Oswald only watched her.

“What no complaints? No fussing?” The woman huffed, before complaining further about how her efforts are not appreciated and pushing past Jim to pick up clothing. Some of which was Jim’s, which he tried to take away from her only to be told off for his efforts. Given the confused but amused look on Oswald. Her behaviour was nothing new. Jim didn’t know what to think as he saw her making an ‘I’m watching you’ gesture as she leaves.

“That’s Olga.” Oswald said as though it explained everything and perhaps to the hungover mobster it did.

“She seems… attentive?” Jim tried, but there he was standing in his pants with none of his clothing available. Oswald seemed to be stiff now as he was watching Jim and like Jim completely unsure of what to do. Eventually Oswald managed to collect himself and chased Jim off before they could talk about what happened or what to do. Jim did notice that Oswald did seem –

Hurt.

Jim wanted to feel less bad then he did, it was a stupid mistake. Getting drunk with Oswald, getting married to Oswald, and having sex with Oswald. It was all a big unfortunate mistake. And yet, Jim couldn’t help but stare at the wedding ring. The last one he had, he had to take off because things with Lee and himself were not working out well. Jim loved her, he always will. But too much has happened between them. Despite that all of that Jim goes to her when he needs help that Harvey would probably lock him up for. Jim didn’t know what he would do without her.

Then again, too much has happened between Oswald and Jim. They were enemies. They were at times friends. They were allies. And then they were enemies who just happened to be able to be friendly with each other when the situation allowed them to. Turbulent to say the least. Always expanding, changing and shifting.

He remembered Oswald’s hurt.

Did Oswald want this?

Surely, he could have picked better. Jim knows what kind of person he is and can be. But then, Oswald was a psychopathic mobster at the worst of times and a mobster at the best of times. Either way, Oswald was Oswald.

By the end of the week and after a conversation with Lee, Jim stood in front of the refurbished Iceberg Lounge. It took a lot to go through those doors and bully his way into seeing Oswald who seemed completely flabbergasted and annoyed at his presence. That was before other emotions were forcefully shut down and hidden away. Because being vulnerable was something Oswald couldn’t afford here.

Jim closed the door so that it was just the two of them.

“I think we should talk.” Jim said, inching closer to the desk as steadily as he could without earning a gun pointed at him or a knife thrown at him. Oswald looked like he was contemplating either choice at the moment.

“I think we shouldn’t talk.” Oswald snapped in return; a voice as cold as the disgruntled mobster could manage. Which at the moment wasn’t cold at all. Either that or Jim was just aware of the man’s tones now.

“Oswald.” Jim tried.

“Penguin.” Oswald pushed back.

“Oswald.” Jim remained firm.

The man gave Jim the victory there, but Jim knew he was going to pay for it somehow later. But he couldn’t afford to let Oswald put distance between them through a name. Jim wasn’t invested in The Penguin. He was invested in Oswald Cobblepot.

“We got married, and it’s legal. I found the legal papers. And a rather terrified priest who officiated it. In a church. With a witness who was literally dragged off the street and told to sit down, shut up and not say a word.” Jim really wished he could remember more than vague blurry glimpses. He held the papers out so Oswald could check. Jim wondered if the man even looked for the evidence or did he try and pretend it didn’t happen. There was a third option, one that had him remembering the vulnerable docile man still curled under the blankets.

“I take it you wish for a divorce, you’re particularly good at it.” Ouch, but valid. Jim would defend later that despite the divorce he had a pretty decent friendship going on with Lee. Jim sat down, thankful that the discomfort and mild pain was gone when he sat down.

“Do you?” Jim asked in return because the way Oswald was behaving in his wording down to the petulant glares and agitation that screamed out through the man’s body language was giving Jim another story.

It took some back and forth, but eventually Jim much to his shock, discovered that no Oswald didn’t want to get a divorce. Although the man wasn’t pleased with how it happened Oswald was selfish enough to keep what he deemed his.

Which now seemed to include Jim.

They decided with their turbulent history as it was, that therapy would be the most reasonable choice for them to go through. More so Jim than Oswald, who had a deep distrust for doctors. With good reason, but for Jim he put forth that effort. 

The couple therapist was petrified by the end of the first appointment deeming them both as individuals who need serious help.

Jim never fully moved in with Oswald, but he did spend more time with him whenever either job would allow them. The next time they had a ‘celebration’ they were sober enough to actually remember it and the night after. And Jim could confirm, Oswald was a biter.


	2. Gorzsasz

Jim Gordon had many issues; he would be the first to reluctantly admit to them, although he does admit that it was a conversation he tried to avoid whenever and however possible. No one in Gotham should blame him for this. But there were those who do, and often they were the ones who had the most skeletons in their closets. 

One of those many issues – was alcohol. Gone were the days where Jim could be considered a straight good cop who did things by the book. Jim huffed lightly, to him it felt like a lifetime ago. 

And so, today like many days before Jim arrived at GCPD headquarters with a massive hangover and aching from obvious activities that included a struggle and sex or rough sex, Jim wasn’t entirely sure. Regardless, Jim would have to make a discreet appointment to make sure he didn’t pick up any STD’s or anything else. 

There was also the issue of – 

“Is that a ring?” Jim was immediately asked as soon as he made it through the doors. 

Fuck… 

“Yes.” Jim forced out. 

Several more questions came this way, the third finally got the point of leave him alone after he snapped loud enough for several people to rethink their question. No one spoke to him when he finally made it to his desk, well except for Harvey who had a grin on his face because apparently taking a hint in not asking or talking to him about it was out of the question. There was a faint odour of alcohol on Harvey, enough to make Jim both want to gag and want to go drown himself in alcohol once more. 

Instead, he greeted his friend with a curt, “What.” 

“So, who’s the lucky woman.” Harvey asked clearly unbothered by Jim’s whole vibe of don’t ask and don’t talk to me before a pot of coffee was had. Or even two with how he was feeling at the moment. 

Asshole. 

“Not – I don’t know.” Jim admitted reluctantly and had to sit through laughter that died off when Harvey realized how serious Jim was. Once Harvey was finished, Jim went on to explain that the ring was stuck and he can’t seem to retrace his steps on figuring out who he got married to. Jim didn’t give too much details on the bruises or his aches and pains. 

Harvey volunteered to look into that today so long as they don’t get stuck on a murder case. Jim appreciated it. 

And just like that, the day carried on. 

The day turned to a week before Harvey came back uncomfortable and sat down at his desk, his initial offer of going to the morgue or anywhere where they won’t have anyone listening. Jim declined as he fiddled with a ring, he couldn’t get off still. Turns out it was super glued or something. Reluctantly, Jim had to admit to the fact that it was a beautiful ring that was black and gold. According to Harvey, it looked expensive, Jim had to agree with him on that. 

“You have any alcohol?” Harvey asked, Jim didn’t unfortunately and Harvey continued, “Might need it. Because I found out who you got married to.” Jim didn’t really like the foreboding feeling that was settling in his gut. He prayed that it was just some random person or even a prostitute. But the indication that he might need alcohol didn’t really give him a lot of hope in that regard. 

“Who?” Jim didn’t want to know, he hoped-prayed even- that Harvey wouldn’t answer. And yet, he needed to know. And just like that, Jim had to listen to the bad news with his own disbelief heard in every word.

“Jim, you married Victor as in Victor Zsasz.” 

“Fuck off.” 

“I’m serious.” 

“No way…” 

“Jim…” 

“Fuck…” 

“Yeah…” 

“Him.” 

“According to my investigation, yeah.” Harvey confirmed leaving Jim to slouch in his chair slightly, the sombre mood just seemed to settle between them. Jim honestly didn’t think he’d get himself in a situation where he would find himself married to one of Gotham’s most feared hitman. 

How was he able to do this? More so, how was he not dead? 

And where was Victor Zsasz? Most of the time, he was making himself known or being a royal pain in the ass. The new captain was angry that they haven’t arrested him yet, didn’t put him away for multiple murders and other crimes. But then, Jim knew better because Victor managed to just stay out of the reach of the law. Too many underground connections, too many people would rather see him free on the streets and useful or dead in a ditch like a forgotten legacy. No one wanted him behind bars. No one was brave enough to put him through the process of a trial. 

The next two days Jim felt hyperaware and on the lookout for Victor, Harvey offered to put a restraining order on him. But they both knew that it would do nothing in the long run. 

The third day since he found out who he was married to, Jim’s life would take a turn. It was just not how he expected, Jim was chasing down a murder suspect who went by Joe with Harvey when they were separated. Jim was the lucky one who found himself in a fight for his life. 

With his side feeling on fire, Jim was trying to keep himself upright against a wall. 

He won the fight – but barely. 

The gun still hot in his hand, and Joe was still breathing. So that counted as something? But then, this guy was a bad guy. Worse than most of the individuals Jim deals with, this guy targeted kids specifically and Jim – well he had to do everything in his power to not simply walk over to the unconscious man and put a bullet in his head. 

Jim didn’t know what that said about him. 

But then, he lived in Gotham – Gotham had a way of doing that to you if it didn’t chew you up and spit you out first. 

“Fuck…” Was Jim’s last word before he collapsed and found himself slipping into that warm embrace of darkness, only faintly hear the sound of a gunshot and his name soon after. 

It would be days before Jim wakes up again – at the hospital. It would be from Harvey that he finds out that it was because of Victor that he was alive. Harvey was the one who stumbled onto the body of Joe and the bloodstain that was Jim’s. It left him surprised. And yet, no Victor. 

It won’t be until that night that he finally gets to meet with his apparent unplanned spouse. 

Who was sitting on the end of his bed and eating green jello. 

“We’re not getting divorced. My Bubbe doesn’t agree with divorces and she would like to meet with you one day.” Was all Victor said before tossing the empty jello aside. 

It would take Jim a month to manage to pin the man down long enough to gauge how he was feeling about this, which was harder than Jim expected. When Victor didn’t want to be found – you couldn’t find him. Eventually, Jim did find out that the man wasn’t normally a drinker and wasn’t fond of the circumstances that he got married under. And for Jim to find out just how intimidating a small petite woman could be and how accepting she was of Victor’s lifestyle. 

Jim and Victor never had sex again but Jim found that Victor carved a spot out in Jim’s life for himself and if they found a semblance of peace behind closed doors. Who’s to say but them? 

Jim found that for his remaining days as a detective, no credible hitman took the job of taking him out and the ones who did disappear soon after.


End file.
